Thursday, August 7, 2008

Supplies party

WCK and I went to Target yesterday and bought most of her school supplies. Who knew that buying school supplies for a three-year-old could be such an ordeal? I purchased the slim markers without crying, mostly because I was too stressed out about glue.

As I stood among the supply bins at Target, I noticed that the list called for "three large Elmer's glue sticks (77 oz)". Wait a minute. The child needs SEVENTY-SEVEN OUNCES of glue? What kinds of craft projects are they going to be doing at this school? I pictured WCK and two or three other preschoolers hoisting one enormous 77-ounce stick of glue upon their shoulders and gluing, I don't know, a pair of cement bricks together. Obviously, this was a typo. I found a glue stick that was labeled "25 g." Did the teacher mean grams? But then three of them would not add up to 77. Wait. Would they? No.

Keep in mind that WCK and I are still practicing our early-morning schedule, and I had consumed far too little caffeine to be doing complicated thinking at Target.

I was so distraught that I ended up buying the wrong kind of paint and a non-washable stamping pad, when the list clearly stated it needed to be washable. My child will come home permanently covered in pink ink, and it won't wear off until first grade. I am the worst mother ever.

I came home and found the Elmer's glue web site, which revealed that the company sells a glue stick in a .77-ounce size. Ah! It was a decimal-point problem!

All we need now are the mysterious glue sticks, a new stamp pad and paint set, and something called "Fun Dough." Before I went to Target, I did not read the fine print on the list, which reveals that the "Fun Dough" is only available at -- cue Psycho music -- Wal-Mart.

Ree! Ree! Ree!

How much fun can this dough be?

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